It's Raining Bats and Cats
by Hinn-Raven
Summary: Artemis Crock is Black Cat, AKA the protégé of Catwoman, the big sister of Robin, the adopted daughter of Batman, the friend of the Justice League… wait, what? AU. Spitfire and BatCat


**A/N: Crossposting my birthday present for Amelia From A Fairy Tale over here! Hope you guys enjoy it as much as she did! **

**Disclaimer: I claim no more responsibility for Young Justice than for the weather. Until you can prove my status as a Weather God, I'll settle for writing fanfiction. **

* * *

The sound of sirens was one familiar to all of the inhabitants of Crime Alley.

Jim Gordon deeply wished it wasn't. He pulled off his jacket, draping it over the small girl huddled in the corner of her couch. She wasn't much older than his Barbara, he thought wretchedly as he looked at her, tears streaking her bruised face, knees tucked against her chest. Her blonde hair was dirty; her clothes were well-worn and a little small. She looked, for all the world, like a nine-year old kid who had just been told her father had died. He'd seen plenty of those. He'd made too many house-to-house calls in his career, telling victims' families, cops' families, and even criminals' families that their loved one was dead. He'd never had to tell the daughter of a world-class mercenary and super villain that her father was dead, however.

Jade Nguyen, age thirteen and Artemis's only available relative, was nowhere to be found. A little digging discovered that she was a runaway, hadn't been seen in almost eight months. Artemis's mother, Paula Nguyen Crock, was in prison for at least another five years.

And now, Jim Gordon, the man who had pulled the trigger, killing Lawrence "Crusher" Crock, was waiting for Artemis's new legal guardian, one Selina Kyle, to come pick up her ward.

"It's going to be okay," he told Artemis, placing a hand on her shoulder.

She let out a little snort. "People always say that."

"I know," he said heavily. "I know."

There was a knock on the door. He opened it, unsure of what to expect.

Whatever it was, it wasn't her.

Tall, slender, and beautiful, dressed in a near skirt and blouse, with prominent jewelry and an expensive looking purse tucked under one arm, Selina Kyle was not exactly someone that Jim Gordon would expect to see in Crime Alley. Her hair was short and dark, her eyes were gleaming and green. "I'm here to pick up Artemis," she said, her voice a gentle alto.

"You Selina?" He asked, stepping aside to let her into the dingy apartment, which had already been combed through by the MCU, in search of more evidence for Sportsmaster's laundry list of crimes.

"That's right," she said, flashing him an ID that was either real or provided by one of Gotham's forty-two people who could make IDs that looked legitimate. He didn't bother taking a closer look. Paula Crock had provided a phone number, and he was sure it had been the right one.

Kyle stepped around him neatly, moving towards Artemis. She knelt in front of her. "Hey kitten," her voice was gentle.

Artemis threw herself forward, sobbing. Kyle's arms wrapped around the child, pulling her in close.

Jim Gordon just stood to the side. He eyed the black eye that Artemis had and hoped that he'd done the right thing.

* * *

"How do I look?" Artemis held out her arms, smirking. The thirteen year old was clad in armored spandex, complete with a mask that hid her facial features. The high neck and lack of maturity made the outfit a lot less… sexual than it was on her mother-figure. A whip hung at her side, and elbow length gloves functioned as secondary weapons as well as tools.

"Perfect, kitten," Selina said, smiling from her position by the window. Her goggles were fastened over her eyes, and her smile was wide and loving. "Now come here. Let's show Gotham how much trouble we can cause."

Artemis let out a laugh and moved towards her. Selina's arms wrapped around her in a hug once she got close enough.

Selina pressed a kiss against Artemis's hair, cropped just beneath her earlobes and curled slightly inward. "You're going to knock them all dead, kitten."

Artemis beamed up at her mother-figure. "Obviously!"

* * *

"You brought a _child _into the business?" Bruce demanded, crossing his arms.

"You did first," Selina pouted. "Besides, Artemis has had far more training."

"You're teaching her to be a _thief_," Bruce said, glaring. Selina ignored him in favor of pouring herself a glass of champagne.

"_I'm_ a thief, in case you forgot. She'll be like me. You can't complain about that. Unless you plan to start with me."

Bruce ran his hands over his face.

"Stop worrying," Selina instructed, pressing a kiss against the corner of his mouth. She climbed back into bed and cuddled against him. "Mmm… we seem to be ending up here a lot lately," she said softly.

"I didn't think you minded," Bruce said, uncrossing his arms.

"Never," Selina purred, moving in to kiss him.

"I love you," he muttered softly.

"Love you too, Bruce," she said. She laid back into the pillow, wrapping the expensive silk sheets around herself and Bruce. She yawned, closing her eyes.

"Selina…" He started.

"Bruce, we do need to sleep," she said, eyes firmly shut.

"Marry me?" He asked.

"Ask me again," she said, smiling. "When we're both more awake."

* * *

"They're at it _again_," Artemis said sing-song, sipping from a champagne flute filled with Sierra Mist.

"You're _surprised_?" Richard Grayson asked her, looking as comfortable in his miniature suit as Artemis was in her expensive dress. That is to say, very by this point in their lives, although they hadn't been at first.

"Not at all," Artemis said. "Especially not with…" She trailed off.

"The ring and all?" Dick completed with a grin.

"How'd you find out?" Artemis asked, raising an eyebrow.

"A little hacking, a little eavesdropping… hey, I'm a detective. You?"

"Snooping," Artemis said happily. "Hey, I'm a thief."

"_Reformed_," Dick said, elbowing her in the side.

"Mostly," she corrected, smirking.

Dick rolled his eyes. "So, when are they gonna do it?" He said, watching as Bruce led Selina to the dance floor. Bruce was at his most charming playboy self, smiling and laughing and flirting. Selina was at her best too, looking drop dead gorgeous in a floor length, low cut, tight fitting red dress. The two of them were the picture perfect couple, dancing slowly. Vicki Vale was signaling desperately to her photographer, clearly hoping to get some shots of Bruce whispering in Selina's ear, or the way that Selina was moving in slowly for a kiss.

"So," Artemis said, swirling the liquid in her glass a bit. "You really get to go to the Hall of Justice next week?"

"Yeah," Dick said with a grin. "It's going to be _awesome_."

There was a pause, as the two of them watched their respective adoptive-parents do the dance of flirting and dramatic pauses.

"The press is going to have so much fun," Artemis said.

"With the Hall or this?"

"Both, really," Artemis said. "But then, if it wasn't this riling them up into a frenzy, it would be the latest Kane Family Drama." The all caps were audible, probably because it was also the name of a reality show that was in the works.

"What's it this time? Did Markus finally divorce Cathy?"

"Nah, Kate got expelled from West Point. Under, and I quote, 'mysterious circumstances'."

"What's the running theory?"

"The _Gazette _claims inappropriate conduct, the _Daily Star_'s saying drug abuse… Bette's trying to convince me that Kate decked a general's kid…"

"How much does Bette know?"

"Nada," Alice smirked. "She's as much in the dark as we are."

"Eh, I'm sure I'll figure it out eventually," Dick said dismissively.

"Detective," Artemis said dismissively.

"Burglar."

"Circus brat."

"Crime alley kid."

"Bat."

"Cat."

"Shrimp."

"Blondie."

Artemis snorted. "Oh you went _there_?"

"I went there," Dick grinned.

"Watch it Bird-Boy, or I'll dig out the Dick jokes."

"Oooh, another repetitive session!" Dick laughed. "Speaking of the Kanes…" he said in a low voice, tilting his head to one side.

Bette Kane walked up to them, looking polished and pretty in a knee length black dress with a white belt. "Hey Artemis! Hey Dick!"

"Hey Bette," Artemis said, fiddling with the gold locket she wore around her neck as she smiled at her friend. "How was New York?"

"Oh, it was great!" Bette gushed. "We stayed in this penthouse in New York…"

The two protégés exchanged glances and allowed the Kane girl to dominate conversation.

* * *

There was a basket of kittens in the middle of Mount Justice.

They all just stood there and stared.

There were five of them: two tabbies, a calico, an orange-and-white, and a tuxedo.

"How did they…" M'gann stepped forward tepidly.

"Where did they come from?" Conner asked, bewildered as one of the kittens—the black one—settled in his hair with a purr.

"Black Cat," Robin said, recovering. He pulled a piece of string out of his utility belt and dangled it in front of one of the kittens. The kitten batted at it, intent on the black yarn decorated with beads in the colors of Robin's uniform.

"Dude," Kid Flash said, looking at his best friend oddly. "That's a calico."

"I _know_ that?" Robin rolled his eyes beneath his mask. "I meant that Black Cat left the kittens here."

"Who's Black Cat?" M'gann asked, staring at the haughty tabby making its way up her arm.

Kaldur carefully scratched his own tabby behind the ears before he answered. "The protégé of Catwoman."

"A thief?" Conner asked, trying to see the kitten on his head without dislodging it.

"Sometimes," Robin said cheerfully. "She helps the good guys sometimes."

"_Sometimes_," Wally scoffed. "How'd she even get in here?" He poked the orange kitten, which had been staring at him. The kitten bit him, drawing blood. "Ouch!" He yelped, sticking his finger in his mouth.

"Trade secret," an unfamiliar voice said from behind them. They all jumped and spun around except Robin, who dragged his string along the counter. The kitten crouched, staring intently at the string. Its rear end wiggled in anticipation, before it pounced. Robin grinned, pulling the string out of the way just in time to save it from the kitten's tiny paws.

"Hey Cat," he said while he continued to torment the innocent creature.

"Hey Bird," she responded. The orange cat that had bitten Wally leapt into her arms, purring loudly, as if to prove that anybody was good as long as it wasn't Kid Flash.

"She" in question was a girl about Wally's age. Dressed in tight fitting spandex with gloves, an honest-to-Batman _tail_ and tiny cat ears attached to her mask, her identity was obvious. Her hair was short and blonde, her eyes steely grey, and her smile was predatory in nature as she looked at the group of young heroes.

"Why kittens?" M'gann asked, petting her tabby nervously. Robin didn't seem to think she was a threat, so surely this Black Cat wouldn't attack them… right?

"Why not?" Black Cat grinned. "This one's Bennet. The one you've got is Rosmerta. The other tabby's Valjean. The black one's Crowley, the calico's Shasta."

"How'd you get in?" Wally demanded again, speaking around his (no longer bleeding) finger.

"Magic," she said dryly, placing Bennet on Robin's head.

Wally snorted.

"And, while this has been fun…" She drawled, smirking at Kid Flash in a way that irritated him to no end for no particular reason at all.

She slipped around the corner, still smiling infuriatingly.

They couldn't find her after that.

(Much to Wally's annoyance.)

* * *

The engagement of Selina Kyle and Bruce Wayne was Major News. Artemis glanced at the newspaper, wondering what the tabloids would do if they figured out that Selina and Bruce had been living together for the past few months.

"Miss Artemis," Alfred said, setting a plate of eggs in front of her. "You best hurry up. You and Master Richard will be late for school at this rate."

"Thanks Alfred," Artemis said, picking up her fork and starting to eat her eggs in both a timely and polite fashion. (Selina's etiquette lessons were very useful on occasion.)

Dick bounced into the kitchen, humming something vaguely Disney-esque, slightly off key. "Good morning!" He sang.

Bruce, in his usual pre-nineteenth cup of coffee state, glowered and muttered something that was either "I am the night" or "good morning."

Selina, dressed in one of her far too numerous to count silk dressing gowns, drinking a cup of tea, smiled at Dick. "Good morning," she said.

"First day of school!" Dick sang, slipping into his seat besides Artemis. "This will be fun!"

"It's only been a week since you've seen Barbara, stop complaining," Artemis said, rolling her eyes.

Dick stuck out his tongue at her before starting to spear pancakes to claim for his plate. He then proceeded to smear them with butter, coat them in maple syrup, sprinkle them with sugar from the sugar bowl, and then polish it off with a large dollop of whip cream.

"That's just disgusting," Artemis said. "That's just too much sugar."

"Says the girl who puts _ketchup _on her **eggs**."

"That's delicious," Artemis said loftily, eating another spoonful of said concoction. "And at least this won't give me a sugar rush."

"Sugar rushes are for the _weak_," Dick declared, reaching for the coffee carafe, his bright blue eyes wide and mildly crazed. Without even looking up from her perusal of the Gotham Gazette, Selina moved it out of his reach.

Dick pouted, but continued to eat his sugar-filled breakfast.

"Meow," Nymeria nudged Bruce's hand. The large, rather fat Siamese female never seemed to understand the "no cats on the table" rule. Or, at the very least, never managed to care, even when Bruce was awake enough to brandish the spray bottle.

Bruce muttered something that might have been "_get away from me you feline_," but was equally likely to be "_I'm the goddamn Batman, give me more coffee_."

Selina, assuming it to be the latter, poured him another cup of coffee.

Alfred reentered the room, Othello and Alice running around his feet. The twin white puffballs had adopted Alfred as their own, following the Englishman everywhere. Artemis sometimes told Dick that she was pretty sure they even meowed with an Oxford accent. Alfred raised an eyebrow at the table. He looked at Dick and Artemis expectantly. "You are about to be late," he informed them. Othello and Alice mewed in agreement, managing to convey Alfred's _I'm-disappointed-in-you-but-too-British-to-say-any thing_ in their tiny voices.

Artemis and Dick finished off their respective breakfasts, and then got to their feet. They grabbed their backpacks, (upending Daisy off her resting place in the process) and brushed off the fur, kissed Selina on the cheek, vaguely waved at Zombie Bruce, and then ran out the door, where Alfred had already managed to be waiting for them in the Audi.

"Do you ever think we have too many cats?" Dick asked Artemis conversationally.

"Never," she said cheerfully, not too surprised to see that Rudy had managed to claim shotgun. The black and white cat let out a purr of contentment.

* * *

"_Again_?" Wally shouted in frustration.

The Team stared at the trio of kittens sitting on Wolf. There was a white one with a single orange ear and a spot on its back, a tortoiseshell one with bright green eyes, and a pure black one, bathing itself, pink tongue a stark contrast with the rest of it. Little rhinestone-studded collars with little Bat Symbol name tags were on their necks, announcing their names.

"Balerion, Eleni and… Yertle?" Conner read as he approached them. He stared at Yertle the Tortoiseshell Kitten.

Robin snickered. "That one's _bad_," he commented to Zatanna.

"So… she just… breaks in and leaves kittens?" Zatanna asked, confused. She'd already met the others, but really, ten kittens were enough to keep track of… thirteen was going to be a nightmare.

"It's her thing," Wally grumped, although he was petting Balerion the little black nightmare.

"How does she… get in here?" Zatanna asked, cautiously holding out her hand for Eleni to sniff.

Eleni licked her hand, tongue like sandpaper.

"We don't _know_," Wally grumbled, frustrated. "She just keeps getting in!"

"Well it would hardly be fun if you guys _knew_," Black Cat walked in, arms full of kittens. "Oh, I also got the files on Cheshire that you guys wanted."

"That was Red Arrow," Kaldur commented.

"I broke into a top secret facility for _Speedy_?" She laughed. Liesel and Finnick fell out of her arms, eager to meet the new arrivals. Beckendorf, from his position on her shoulder, just stared at the Team and the newest kittens with wide yellow eyes.

"Is this a _scratching post_?" M'gann asked, staring at a large, carpeted structure that had popped up in the corner of the living room. She hadn't noticed it before, too busy being enchanted by the kittens.

"Yep," Artemis said cheerfully. "Also I brought some more catnip mice."

"You spoil them," Robin said cheerfully.

"Yes," she said matter-of-factly. She turned to Zatanna, smiling in a way that was slightly scary and yet reassuring at the same time. "Now, you must be Zatanna. Nice to meet you."

"Uh… thanks?" Zee looked at the others, who offered no help at all.

Beckendorf leapt into Zatanna's arms. He gave her a look that said, _well, aren't you going to pet me, peasant?_

So Zatanna did.

* * *

Artemis slipped over the rooftops, smirking. Keystone was a fun city to explore. She fingered the gold necklace around her neck, with a single diamond pendant. A nice, shiny target to get the attention of a speedster.

Her phone buzzed, letting her know that Dick wanted an update. She ignored it in favor of leaping across the rooftops, somersaulting. She was after attention tonight.

Sure enough, only half a block later, the familiar red and yellow blur appeared.

She let out a small laugh, pulling down her goggles. This would be _fun_.

The speedster skidded to a halt below her. "Black Cat!" Wally West shouted. "You better be planning on returning that!"

"Ask me nicely," she purred. She angled herself so that the street light caught the diamond and gleamed.

_Baiting the trap._

His eyes narrowed. He charged the wall, managing to run up it. Not even pausing, he charged her, hands grabbing for the necklace. She twisted out of the way, smirking. Kid Flash skidded to a halt, glaring. Her leg snapped out, catching him in the chest.

"_Oof_!" Kid Flash went flying into the pavement. Moving quickly, before he could recover, she straddled him, smirking.

"Hey babe," she said, running her hands along his spandex-covered abs.

"Missed you too," Wally grumbled, blushing a little.

"Good to hear," she purred, leaning in, brushing her lips against his for a moment.

"How was the mission?" He asked, grinning up at her.

"Good," she said, moving to his ear. He shivered beneath her, and her smirk grew. "Found out that Bruce had a test tube baby with Talia al Ghul. Selina's not exactly happy…"

"You're joking," he said.

"I wish. The kid's a brat. But anyways, talking later."

"Sounds good to me," Wally said, wiggling his hands free so that he could pull her down for a proper kiss.


End file.
